He wanted her Attention and now He has it!

“Through my Sufferings”

Shortly after I called on my family and friends to pray concerning the cancer threat that was upon my life  I received a word from a lady from one of our northern churches which I will only share part of it with to you.

 December 9, 2011 at 9:08 am

He wanted her attention and now He has it.  We Praise You Father for healing, for the wisdom, the revelation you are imparting in her for others.  New chapter in her life and God is totally in control.  Thank you Father amen.

 

When I shared this with one of my family members they said that those words were hard to swallow, “He wanted her attention and now He has it.”  They continue by saying, you pray, you are always seeking him daily.  How could that be?

I responded back immediately and said, “No this is something much deeper and it goes down to the core of my being.   Things only God and I alone know, that inner voice that woos us closer to surrender the things that bring harm to us, but yet we continue doing them.

Job 34:28

The cry of the afflicted got God’s attention… the message bible

I asked myself “Barbara” what did you do, to allow this to happen?  I remember turning to the book of “Job” wanting to find answers to the many questions flooding my mind.

Job 1:7-12

7 The Lord said to Satan, “Where have you come from?”

Satan answered the Lord, “From roaming through the earth and going back and forth in it.”

8 Then the Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil.”

12 The Lord said to Satan, “Very well, then, everything he has is in your hands, but on the man himself do not lay a finger.” Then Satan went out from the presence of the Lord.  NIV

Commentary notes,  Job 1:6-12

The permission God gave to Satan to afflict Job for the trial of his sincerity. Satan desired God to do it: Put forth thy hand now. God allowed him to do it (v. 12): “All that he has is in thy hand; make the trial as sharp as thou canst; do thy worst at him.” Now, 1. It is a matter of wonder that God should give Satan such a permission as this, should deliver the soul of his turtle-dove into the hand of the adversary, such a lamb to such a lion; but he did it for his own glory, the honour of Job, the explanation of Providence, and the encouragement of his afflicted people in all ages, to make a case which, being adjudged, might be a useful precedent. He suffered Job to be tried, as he suffered Peter to be sifted, but took care that his faith should not fail.  (from Matthew Henry’s Commentary)

So there you have it Job was perfect in God’s eyes and yet Satan challenged him and wanted to prove that Job would curse God for allowing suffering to come upon him.

I needed to know from God what it was that I needed to do to get through this evil that had come my way.  I call this part of my journey the “dark tunnel of uncertainty.”

It took a few days before I would know if the cost would be covered to continue with the tests and treatment that needed to be done.  So I waited, in the mean while I waited, I felt sick to my stomach for months, it would be 2 weeks sick and 2 weeks feeling a little better.  My lungs and bones ached like they were on fire and I felt very weak.

A few days after my first examinations while taking a nap I heard the phone ring, It was ‘a call from my primary care office saying that I needed to get on this like yesterday and things didn’t look good from what they understood. It was eating into my veins and the grade of the aggressiveness of the cancer was at the highest level.

I thanked them and reassured them that I was not going to procrastinate one minute and would move forward as soon as my paperwork was completed.

When I hung up the phone I felt like I was in a dark tunnel and a dark  cloud over me touting me with the words ever so loudly “You are going to Die!”.

I leaned over on my husband’s shoulder and wept.  I didn’t want to die I wanted to live.  I wanted to be with my life partner my husband and spread the gospel to nations.  But what I wanted and what my body was telling me was that I was a very sick person and that it was over.

That weekend we went to Modesto California so my husband could minister.  I felt sicker than ever but knew I needed to be there with him and support the man of my dreams.  The man who I pledged to stay with for better or for worse, no matter what I was going to go with him and be by his side.

As we enter the hotel room I remember holding him so tight and crying out to him, Danny I love you and we are going to see the world together and spread the good news of God among the nations.  I don’t want to leave you and I will fight this thing with God on our side and yes we will win because God said we will!

My body was telling me otherwise, I felt weaker by the second.  I just wanted to close my eyes and not fight.

As we were there in The Modesto church New Harvest Christian Fellowship God used my husband so graciously and I felt the Lord speak to me and say, you will travel with him and be a team for my purpose and doors will open up for the both of you to spread my presence to others.

Calling the Intercessors…

I called on the ladies from my church that I knew were serious intercessor.  I needed them more than ever to believe with me that I will live and death is not a part of the equation.

I remember calling them into my office and telling them what I was facing.  I literally felt them stirred to the point of a Godly anger and refused to accept anything other than victory and life come out of this.  I also have a big army of brothers and sisters throughout the world praying for me.

So the fight is on!  Yes, God has my attention loud and clear!  Does He have your attention?  Don’t wait till hardship comes knocking on your door.  Rise up and hearken unto the voice of the Lord and allow him to get to the core of your being and purge you from the things that you hold on to you that brings harm or perhaps a slow death.  Surrender and allow God to purify your character through adversities.

We really need God  to go in deeper where bitterness and anger, bad choices or bad habits, or what about unforgiveness so God can pull these thing out from us.. These all bring harm to your body, soul, and spirit.

Though this part of suffering in my life God has my total attention.  How about you?  When you allow God to purge you from the core of your being it will take your prayer life to a whole new level of intimacy.

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Mrs. Barbara Casas;

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